This advert reads like we talk. It does swear. We take work incredibly seriously; we take ourselves less so. This isn't how we talk to our clients, or candidates. But this it to work FOR us, so I wanted 'us' to come out in the advert. If you don't like the occasional profanity, maybe don't read on.
Resourcer (Trainee Consultant)
Stockport Centre
Learn how to make a great living, recruiting for some of the world's biggest food and drinks brands.
Side note, before we begin; I used to think Stockport was a bit shit. Actually a lot. Since Andy Burnham invested over a BILLION pounds it's actually fucking brilliant. Fair play to him.
Anyway! Onwards!
THE JOB, IN ONE SENTENCE
Your job is to be brilliant, and also to be honest.
When someone looks back on an interaction with you, they should think — fucking hell, they were good.
Not, "I've no idea who they were, nor any reason whatsoever to remember them".
Not, "Meh".
If someone (rather bizarrely, I'll admit) were to grab a candidate, a client, even a supplier, by the elbow and ask them — what's it like working with Silven? — then they should say, 'fucking brilliant'. They should be compelled to swear because it was so good.
This will reflect on you. It will also reflect you. If you constantly do the right thing, then it'll happen.
If you take shortcuts? If you are lazy? If you chase a quick win instead of doing the right thing?
Then people will say, "Meh". "They were fine".
ON MISTAKES
Some people are going to hate us. That's fine. It comes with having a voice.
And you're going to make some mistakes. You're going to mess up.
That's fine too. You're a human.
Own up to them, notice them, draw attention to them, dance around them so nobody forgets them — and we're in a good place. You won't be in trouble unless you hide them.
As someone once said to me — "I can dig you out of any amount of shit; but you've got to tell me exactly how much shit there is, so I can bring a big enough shovel".
WHAT YOUR DAY WILL LOOK LIKE
You'll be in the office. Five days a week. Every week. So it'll look like coming into the centre of Stockport and trying bloody hard not to eat McDonald's every day, as it is literally next door.
At first: a lot of shadowing and listening and copying. And training. And more of that. And then speaking to people on the phone, feeling a bit like "OH MY GOD HOW ARE THEY LETTING ME DO THIS I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING".
That's fine. See earlier point about shit and shovels.
When you get into the swing of it, you'll be a resourcer. This means:
1. You'll be using the internet, the phone, the email, the linkedin, and your own damn creativity to find the best possible candidates for the businesses we're recruiting for.
2. You'll get in touch with them; text, email, phone, video, voicenote, the whole shebang.
3. You'll understand where they are up to in their career, and figure out together if this will improve their situation.
4. If they aren't looking, you'll find out what may turn their head. What may not.
5. Providing EXCEPTIONAL service. Which basically isn’t all that hard, it is just hard to do all the time.
You'll also be sending mailshots, coding the system. About 50% phone, 50% admin, depending on how you work.
We will teach you some genuine jedi-type mind tricks which will make this easier. Plus you'll call a lot of people. But with a purpose.
You'll be rewarded for doing a brilliant job. You'll write brilliant adverts. You'll send brilliant messages. You'll do things nobody else can quite do.
And yes, you'll do things our way. But you'll also get to be yourself whilst doing it.
PROGRESSION
This isn't a job in a factory where the less we pay you, the better we do. The better you do, the more revenue you generate — so the happier we are to pay you more.
We need managers. We need consultants. We need leaders. We need people to grow and develop and become great. And we'll help you become that person.
I can think of five directors of recruitment businesses who have been trained or developed by us. There's probably more, it isn't like I'm researching this as I go.
You'll be trained through a structured programme, which will develop you very quickly to do certain things incredibly well. You'll be a bit like Liam Neeson in Taken (if you haven't watched it, you should at LEAST know the famous line); except your skills will be considerably less murdery. They'll make you more useful, though.
The likelihood is that if you do what we ask, with the intensity I'd expect, you're going to be finding CVs of people who make placements within the first two months at most.
If you want to be a recruitment consultant, you can be hitting that level within six months to a year. On average, it takes around 4 years to become a department manager. And around 4 years to make a six figure salary.
Most people get lazy before they do; but those who do, tend to do it in four years.
So take a moment, look back four years. Remember one thing you did. Now, think forward four years. You might be earning over £100,000 a year, looking back at you reading this advert, right fucking now.
US
We're a specialist recruitment business placing people in management positions in food and drink manufacturing, and the associated supply chain. That means we supply people who make Nando's sauces for the supermarkets; the ingredients manufacturers who supply them; and Nando's themselves.
It means you won't be finding people on the shop floor on an hourly salary.
Half our serious competition was trained by us. So we train people very well.
We take our work seriously, but ourselves less so — as hopefully you can tell from this advert.
YOU
You need to be willing to give it everything. You can't be ringing in sick every two days. You can't be turning up late. You can't be lying. You can't be shit at the things that you control. You have to take responsibility for your own actions.
You can make mistakes. You can find it hard. You can (and will) think you can't do it — the truth is, if you were good enough to get hired, you were good enough to succeed. We will have your back.
You need to be willing to work longer than your friends, sometimes. Because you'll be rewarded better than they will.
You will need to put your career first, for now. Not forever; but Monday to Friday, for now, your career needs to come first.
This means; you can't be rushing off home every day at 5.30pm on the dot because your girlfriend or boyfriend is making you a casserole. Some days you can — just not every fucking day.
Also: being okay with the managing director swearing is going to help. Never at people. Just to texture his day-to-day language.
You'll also need to be bright; able to hold a conversation; determined; willing to do things that make you uncomfortable; and able to write a decent email.
And you need to want to impress. And you need to believe that if you put in the effort to change and grow and improve, then you can. Because it is true. But only if you believe it is true.
SALARY
At first it's rubbish. It isn't illegal or anything, it's just…kind of rubbish. You'll get bonuses for the fees you bring in, though. Your tea and coffee is covered, which is a minor saving. We'll take you out for drinks, to the races, on various other things.
Basically — the better you do, the more you'll get. If you do brilliantly, you'll be paying for meals out and cool clothes or whatever on earth it is you want to do. If you do badly, you'll be complaining about the bus fare.
It will come, though. If you stick at it, with the right attitude.
SOUND LIKE YOU?
Send your CV and — more importantly — a covering note that tells us why you're the person we're looking for. Not a template. Not a form letter. Something that makes us want to meet you. And not written by fucking AI. Any em-dashes or "here's the thing" moments and we're done. (I would put a laughing with tears emoji here if I had any faith that it'd actually post!).
The covering note is THE MOST IMPORTANT thing for this role. If you don't send one, it's a no. You do not have to copy the tone of this advert; just be you. Or pop me a little video saying why you'll be great. That'll increase your odds of interview by about 5x. My number is (phone number removed)
Salary description
£26500.00 - £50000.00 per year